Hey guys (the two of you still reading…OHAI MUFFIN OHAI LIEBENSWERTGIRL).
It’s been a while, I know. I’ve been trying to keep up, to take the snap shots of my life as it currently is. I’m happy. I can’t remember the last time I was this happy. Yes, I’ve been happy before, but before I’ve always been waiting for the floor to drop out on me and it did.
I’m not suggesting things with Nice Boy end up all perfect and fairy-tale-y (nor would I really want it to be perfect) but I felt the need to make a point on how “real” this is. It’s not on the Internet, it’s not emails furiously sent back and forth, and it isn’t plans for four months down the road because that’s the first time we could meet.
It’s sitting on a couch playing Fruit Ninjas. It’s a bed covered in cat hair and a beagle for a pillow. It’s a sleepy faced man whom you hate to leave in the morning because you know how good mornings with him can be. It’s finally mine and real and no one else’s.
*ahem* I have something in my eye.
But before I get all wrapped up in things, I should probably just write about what prompted this post in the first place.
I’m sure that there are men out there who do this, and by no means do I mean to leave them out.
So here’s the thing, I’m sick and tired of women. To clarify, I am sick & tired of women with their constant “I don’t let men in. I have walls. I’ve been SO hurt in the past”.
Enough. Enough is enough already.
Don’t get me wrong, I had and still have walls. I have an extremely complicated relationship with my father that clouds every relationship I have (both friendly & romantic). I HAVE BEEN HURT.
You want to know what? YOU CAN CHANGE ALL OF IT. You can. You have to want to, and it’s a commitment unlike any I have ever known, but it can be done. Aren’t you sick of your walls? Aren’t you tired of not feeling the way you know deep down you deserve??
Why are we so content to suffer? I understand that as a culture, girls are taught to suffer. We’re taught to serve and you know what, that’s not even what bothers me. What bothers me is the blind acceptance of that.
You can have more. You can live your life differently. You can really look deep inside yourself and become the woman you want to be. You can NOT have walls. You can NOT be hurt further. I know you can ladies. I’m one of the stubbornest asses you’ll meet and I’ve managed to get to this place.
This place where I’m happy. I’m here. I’m at the place where I’ve wanted to be.